Month: February 2018

  • Parsha Mishpatim – Don’t tell ME what to do!!

    Parsha Mishpatim – Don’t tell ME what to do!!

    Parsha Mishpatim

    Don’t tell ME what to do!!

    “Moshe took the Book of the Covenant and read it in earshot of the people and they said…Everything that G-d has said, WE WILL DO AND WE WILL OBEY!” (Exodus/Shemos 24:7)

    We are are continuing our weekly Series:

    Today, we are learning, how Parsha Mishpatim speaks to those who seek Serenity and Recovery.

    As we follow the narrative of the Jewish People from the time they spent as brutalized slaves in Egypt – to the demonstration of G-d’s awesome Power thru the 10 Plagues – to their liberation from Egypt and the Splitting of the Sea – we witness the eternal consummation of G-d’s love of the Jewish People at the Mount Sinai – compared by our sages to the Wedding Canopy.  The Jews came face to face with G-d and received His Ten Commandments like the bride receives the wedding ring from the groom.

    And just like after every wedding ceremony, the happy couple is supposed to enjoy their honeymoon, where the couple can just relax by the pool, sleep in and leisurely tour the scenery of whatever vacation spot they visit.

    Isn’t that the story of the new bride – the Jewish People?  No way!!  In fact, their darling husband, G-d Almighty immediately delivers 53 more Rules (Commandments) to define precisely what was expected of them if they want to keep their relationship with Him.  I don’t know about you, but a couple of months ago the Jewish slaves had Egyptian masters…now they’ve got another Master!  Where’s the Freedom they were promised?

    How could the Jewish People so quickly have said, “We will do and we will obey?”  Isn’t it basic human nature to abhor rules and seek unlimited freedom?  The Jews didn’t tell Pharaoh that they will do and they will obey him!  What are these Mitzvahs?  How are we to understand them?  And how can they bring us closer to G-d?

    NOW, let’s consider what the Parsha can teach those seeking Character Development and Recovery...

    “Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with G-d, as we understood Him, praying only for the knowledge of His will and the power to carry that out” (Step 11 – Big Book pg 59)

    The simple meaning of the word mitzvah is command. It appears in various forms with that meaning about 300 times in the Five Books of Moses. The Talmud mentions that the Jewish People were given 613 mitzvot at Sinai, and numerous codes—most notably, Maimonides’ Sefer Hamitzvot —provide detailed listings. Examples include such diverse acts as having children, declaring G‑d’s oneness, resting on the seventh day, not eating pork, wrapping tefillin on the arm and head, building a Temple in Jerusalem, appointing a king, obeying the sages and providing an interest-free loan.

    In common usage, a mitzvah often means “a good deed”—as in “Do a mitzvah and help Mrs. Goldstein with her packages.” This usage is quite old—the Jerusalem Talmud commonly refers to any charitable act as “the mitzvah.”

    But check this out!

    The word mitzvah is related to the Aramaic word tzavta, meaning to attach or join or link together!

    In this sense, a mitzvah unites and connects the person who is commanded to the Commander, creating a relationship and essential bond.

    What good are they?

    Everyone agrees that G‑d didn’t provide arbitrary “make-work” schemes. Mitzvot have a practical benefit for the person who does them as well as for the entire world.

    The Chinuch, an influential work composed by an anonymous author in 13th-century Spain, is the most complete presentation of mitzvot in this role as a kind of cognitive behavioral therapy for the human species. “Attitudes are molded,” writes the author, “more by what people do than by what they think about.”

    When we take a closer look at the 12 Steps, we can observe something very interesting.  And it sheds great light on the how we are able to find so much success thru the Program.  Simply read all of the 12 Steps on page 59.  And count how many times you can find the word G-d or reference to Him.  And we find “G-d” in SIX of the TWELVE Steps!  And from this we can learn that our success depends on building a 50/50 Partnership with our Higher Power!  Yes, it may seem ironic to most of us.  But, now we can really appreciate how…

    TRUE FREEDOM IS FOUND NOT BY THOSE WHO DEPEND ON THEMSELVES, BUT RATHER BY THOSE WHO DEPEND ON A POWER GREATER THAN THEMSELVES!

     The 12 Step Program has brought Recovery and Sobriety to literally millions of those trapped in Compulsive Behaviors and addiction since 1939.  Isn’t it time that we commit to learning this simple program of ACTION – as it is called.  By doing so, we can break free of our Compulsive Behaviors and personal bondage to our disease!

    By learning the Program and with G-d’s help, we can clear our head of our self-centered character defects and finally bring into alignment our positive thoughts with positive actions!!

    Shabbat Shalom

    Please join others and feel free to post your comments in the box below.
    (ps. if you have a personal story or chiddush, you would like to share, I am looking for “guest” contributors to post.)
  • Miriam’s Post – “Hurt People…Hurt People!”

    Miriam’s Post – “Hurt People…Hurt People!”

    Hurt People…Hurt People!

    To my dear Readers:

    I just read this and felt that it was important to share with you.

    As we all know, sometimes we find ourselves in the middle of misunderstanding, a dispute, a disagreement with another.  What has happened?  Why do we find ourselves drawn right into it?  Please read this below – in both Hebrew and English.

    With love,

    Miriam

     

    חשוב שנדע דבר עמוק מאוד:

    כל ה”רע” שלנו נובע אך רק בגלל הספק העצמי שלנו בטוב ובמיוחד שבנו.

    לו לא היינו בספק על קיומו של הטוב והעוצמתי שלנו בתוכנו – היינו רק טובים לכולם, רגועים, אוהבים ושמחים.

    אז בפעם הבאה שתהיה לנו מחלוקת עם מישהו בואו ננסה בכל הכוח לזכור:

    הוא במחלוקת איתי רק בגלל שהוא בספק עצמי על קיומו של הטוב שבו. משום שאחרת בכלל לא היה נכנס למחלוקת איתי.

    ואותו הדבר בדיוק לגבי אני עצמי – אם השבתי מחלוקת כלפיו, זה קרה רק בגלל שיש לי עצמי ספק עצמי בטוב שקיים בי.

    כי החיבור והאמון בטוב שבנו יניב מאיתנו יציבות ובהירות דרך – מול כל מה שיעשו לנו. ונתק ממנו – יניב מאיתנו חולשה, פחדים, כעסים ומחלוקות עם כל העולם.

    (by Seigal Aviel)

    It is important that we know something very deep:
    All of our “bad” stems only because of our lack of self-confidence in the good around us and especially within us.
    If we were not in doubt about the existence of our good and power within ourselves – we would always be good to everyone, calm, loving and happy.

    So the next time we have a disagreement with someone, let’s try with all our might to remember:
    A person’s (spouse, friend, family, neighbor, co-worker, grocery clerk, etc.) dispute with me is just because he/she questioned him/herself for the existence of goodness within them. Because otherwise they would not have been in disagreement with me.

    And the same is true of me! – if I responded with a disagreement with him, it happened only because I myself have doubts about the goodness that exists in me.

    When we are cut off from our inherent goodness, we will fall into weakness, fears, anger and disagreements with the whole world.

    Let us all learn that the connection and trust in our own goodness will give us stability and clarity of way – in the face of everything that we experience in life!

  • Parsha Yisro – The Ten Step Program of Recovery

    Parsha Yisro – The Ten Step Program of Recovery

    Parsha Yisro

    The Ten Step Program of Recovery!

    “On the third day when it was morning, there was Thunder and Lightning and a Heavy Cloud on The Mountain, and the Sound of the Shofar was very powerful, and the entire people that was in the camp shuddered” (Exodus/Shemos 19:16)

    We are are continuing our weekly Series:

    Today, we are learning, how Parsha Yisro speaks to those who seek Serenity and Recovery.

    Can you even imagine the DRAMA, the ANTICIPATION, the EXCITEMENT that must have been felt by every man, woman and child at Mt. Sinai on the day that G-d came down to give the Jewish People the TEN COMMANDMENTS?!

    These are the same people that G-d “took out of Egypt” as lowly, poor slaves who have within 49 days have been transformed to be worthy to be the only generation ever – before and up until this day – that collectively heard and experienced the Almighty firsthand.

    Our sages compare The Giving of the Ten Commandments to the experience of a husband and wife as they meet and exchange vows under the Chupah.  Before, each of them were single and independent – then with Seven Blessings and the exchange of one ring – Presto – the couple is married.  So too, the Children of  Israel are compared to the Bride and Hashem to the Groom.  And Forever, they lived happily every after!

    Well maybe not!  In fact, it was only 39 1/2 days later that the Children of Israel started to worship idols and engage in promiscuity.  It is evident that they violated nine out of the ten Commandments!!  Oy Veh…

    Maybe we can get a better understanding about the inclination of the Human Basic Drives.  And we can answer a nagging question of why G-d chose these and only these 10 Commandments.  Perhaps we will see how G-d Almighty knew a lot about human nature, the evil inclination and how the 10 Commandments are the antidote!

    As they say, “to begin, we have to look at the end.”  So let’s look at the 2nd five of the Ten Commandments, Exodus 20:1-21

    6. You shall not murder.

    7. You shall not commit adultery.

    8. You shall not steal.

    9. You shall not give false testimony against your neighbor.

    10. You shall not covet your neighbor’s house. You shall not covet your neighbor’s wife, or his manservant or maidservant, his ox or donkey, or anything that belongs to your neighbor.

    NOW, let’s consider what the Parsha can teach those seeking Character Development and Recovery...

    As it says on Page 30 of the Big Book:

    “We are convinced to a man that addicts of our type are in the grip of a progressive illness.”

    Bill Wilson, in his remarkable understanding of human nature and the process of addiction notes that addicts have this “idea that somehow, someday they will control and enjoy their compulsive behavior” – (be it alcohol, food, lust, work, shopping, smart phones, social media and more.)  The persistence of this illusion is astonishing.  Many pursue it into the gates of insanity or death!”

    Now let’s take a deeper look at the last half of the Ten Commandments.  And you may need to stand on your head to understand this insight.  Or I’ll help you by showing you the last half of the Ten Commandments in reverse.  There is a very profound message in reversing the exact order of Steps number Ten thru Six.  So let’s use one of the most fundamental Tools of Logic.  It’s called “Cause and Effect.”  Researchers tell us that Cause and Effect is the natural order that connects one process ( the cause) with another process (the effect), where the first is partly responsible for the second, and the second is partly dependent on the first.  Did you get that?

    I think you’ll be amazed when we apply Cause and Effect to the last five of the Ten Commandments.  By reversing the order, we will see what a Progressive Illness we face

    10. If you covet your neighbor’s house – his wife, or his manservant or maidservant, his ox or donkey, or anything that belongs to your neighbor…

    Which will likely Cause you to…

    9. Give false testimony against your neighbor…(so you can get closer to his wife!)

    Which will likely Cause you to…

    8. Steal…(his wife!)

    Which will likely Cause you to…

    7. Commit adultery…(with his wife!)

    Which will likely Cause you to…

    6. MURDER!!! (her husband – maybe not physically, our Sages teach us that when we embarrass a man, it is as if we murdered him.  Can you imagine a greater embarrassment than to have your wife commit adultery with your neighbor?!)

    Bill Wilson wasn’t the first one to understand what it’s like to be in the grip of a progressive illness.  Now it makes perfect sense why The Almighty gave us the last half of the Ten Commandments in such an ideal arrangement!  Our Sages teach us that “Snuis” – Promiscuity is compared to Avoda Zara!  Hashem also knew that if He didn’t give us the structure of the “Second Tablet” – which are the laws of ben adam l’chavaro-between a man and his fellow man…we will quickly come to violate the laws of ben adam l’makombetween man and G-d!!

    The 12 Step Program has brought Recovery and Sobriety to literally millions of those trapped in Compulsive Behaviors and addiction since 1939.  Isn’t it time that we commit to learning this simple program of ACTION – as it is called.  By doing so, we can break free of our Compulsive Behaviors and personal bondage to our disease!

    By learning the Program and with G-d’s help, we can clear our head of our self-centered character defects and finally bring into alignment our positive thoughts with positive actions!!

    PS – A quick Vort:  In Chapter 20, verse 1 – precisely right before we heard the Ten Commandments from Hashem is written:

    וידבר אלקים את כל הדברים האלה לאמר

    “And G-d spoke all these statements…saying:”

    As you know from reading many verses in the Torah,it is often written, “And G-d spoke to Moses, saying.”  Why the double language?  Why does the verse need to say “spoke” and “saying.”  Isn’t it redundant?  Wouldn’t we have know that when G-d “spoke” to Moses that G-d was also “saying?” The commentators teach us that Moses had a job as the greatest Prophet of all time and as the Teacher to the Jewish People – that whatever G-d “spoke” to Moses, that he would then “say” it over to the Jewish People.”

    But at this monumental moment, when the Ten Commandments were being given over to the nation –  G-d SPOKE DIRECTLY TO EVERY JEWISH MAN, WOMAN AND CHILD.  Moses did not need to be an intermediary!  So the question is why verse 1 needed to end by using the word “Saying?”  It just isn’t necessary!

    It seems to me that there was a much deeper message that G-d was giving to all of us!  That since this was the first and last time that G-d spoke directly to all of us – and we were on the level, at that moment of Moses…that forever it is our obligation to “SAY” THESE WORDS OVER TO OUR CHILDREN AND OUR CHILDREN TO THEIR CHILDREN IN AN UNBROKEN CHAIN TO US TODAY AND FOREVER!!  May we all merit to take our place in the long line of teachers – like “Moshe Rabeinu” to teach all our offspring the Wisdom and the Beauty of the Eternal Torah…AMEN!

    Shabbat Shalom

    Please join others and feel free to post your comments in the box below.
    (ps. if you have a personal story or chiddush, you would like to share, I am looking for “guest” contributors to post.)